OWAMBE TIPS

It is Saturday... Designated on as #OWAMBEDAY!

I shared below on Walk With Widows Initiative​​ on Facebook but as some of you dey get sudden midlife crisis when you hear the word wi-before-dow, I say make I serve you ya own for hia.

Here are Owambe Tips... Whether devil likes it or not, owambe is back, covid aint strong enough to damage our culture! 😂

1. Groom! I hope you no think say I dey call oko iyawo; I mean, spend some time to arrange yasef, if you don’t want to be arranged in the back of the hall! 

2. Know the venue and time and arrive right on point. This could mean early or right when your attention is needed depending on your relationship to oninkan.

3. Buy aso ebi or know the colour code; blending matters or you’d be treated as an outsider no matter how close you are.

4. Arrive early for reception and strategically locate yourself - that could be closer to the mic, if na you be emcee, closer to the food, if your belly rules, closer to stage, if your legs cannot refuse dance, closer to bathroom, if na ya bladder dey in charge or close to be door, if you be driver for oga madam.

5. Ladies, take extra footwear if you wish to slay or shako with high heel; stop it from sending you to Gbobi! Guys consider sandals except na oyinbo owambe. 

6. If you plan to don dasi, new notes are better, it doesn’t have to be plenty but timing is important. If you hit the floor with 10 Naira notes when 200-500 folks are spraying, (index to the tongue and up) oninkan go turn away from you o. I no say spiri don make many people no like to spray but if you don know poverty before you go know say to just dey spray money na prayer and praise say money! I don pass you, come dey in charge. 

...to be continued. LinkedIn no dey like plenty talk na suit and skirt people dey hia.

7. Take an extra bag. The more expensive the aso ebi, the bigger the bag! 😁 There will be souvenirs, you don’t want to start holding pots and pan on your way out. But if you ain’t a hoarder, plan to be selective in what you take except you have folks you can bless them with. Some souvenirs are really depressive, just leave them on the table when leaving. But hey! Who says you have to take anything... The bag na suggestion o. 😁

8. If you are there to network, try to size up your positioning but hey! Go with God, big attire no be big person o. You fit go end up with a bunch of beefers who go give you great time for owambe but want to have nothing to do with you after. Baba God fit direct you go one corner wey correct person go just waka say, is this seat taken? 😂 no think werin I no think o.

9. Wear a smile and walk tall (no go begin do legbe legbe like say you piss for body). Even with my spotless kleg, walking tall above my 5.6 with my celebrity smile gets me the attention! 😉

10. Yoboyobo gele is just bad! Please either tie it well or leave it hanging from your shoulder or hand. A well tied gele or cap sitting right says loud and clear, MOWAMBE!

Pele, you have a problem with me partying? Abi na with my story? 😂 Once church songs go dey, mo wambe! You kuku know say I get mouth pass to scatter dance floor. The major challenge bus stop be say, I still dey ask Baba God weda to stay in the office of journalist, strategist, organiser, teacher, preacher, counsellor or dramatist! 😂

For now, ENJOY the JOY living brings!